“Right now, the world you are inheriting is locked in a struggle between love and fear. Fear manifests as anger, insecurity, and loneliness. Fear eats away at our society, leaving all of us less whole, so we teach you that every healthy relationship inspires love, not fear. Love shows up as kindness, generosity, and compassion. It is healing. It makes us more whole.”
― Vivek H. Murthy, Together: Why Social Connection Holds the Key to Better Health, Higher Performance, and Greater Happiness
I would like to invite you into a deeper conversation with yourself about self-love, intimacy, social connection, and the power of relationships.
Several months ago, I shared a podcast featuring Surgeon General Vivek Murthy, in which he discusses the profound link between social disconnection and its impact on our health, happiness, and overall well-being. If you missed it, I’ve included it again in this blog:
“We need to more deeply appreciate the relationship between loneliness, social connection, and physical and emotional health.”
― Vivek H. Murthy, Together: Why Social Connection Holds the Key to Better Health, Higher Performance, and Greater Happiness
Why Social Connection Is Important
At this time in our history we live in a world that is stuck in states of defense, separation, and fear. We have lost our ability to engage with ourselves and others through our innate capacity for curiosity, connection, and our concern for the common good of all.
Many of us are taking steps to find answers inside as we look at our own relationships with conditions such as judgment, projection, and fear —whether directed at ourselves or others. Personal growth is not an easy path to take. It requires self inquiry, compassion, light heartedness, and an interest in holding our pain or struggles as opportunities for growth.
I have come to understand that the physical body and nervous system offers us an elegant map for this journey. For me, the body is a metaphor that tells a story about our relationship with ourselves, others, and the world around us. The body speaks to us through our breathing patterns, posture, gestures, and areas of pain.
Today, most bodies I encounter tell a story of disconnection, fear of vulnerability, and uncertainty about the future.
Sometimes I feel that we are all looking for a sense of home outside of ourselves that cannot be found because we are not collectively at home on the inside.
The Lost Sense of Belonging
If we really want to face the truth about the current human condition, then it is time to embrace that our innate sense of belonging - to ourselves and to each other - has been diminished.
To be truly at home with our true nature as humans requires that we enhance our natural capacity to access states of compassion, patience, and a shared investment in the greater good.
For 30 years, I have been exploring this cyclical journey to remember and return to our true roots as humans.
“What does it mean to return to our roots?”
Our lineage of ancestors understood the relationship between connection and interdependence. They knew how to follow the rhythms of the seasons, listen to the needs of their communities, and gather in service of the whole.
Together, they expanded—both individually and collectively—maintaining a delicate balance between personal needs and the well-being of the tribe. In times of pain or contraction, they leaned on one another, ensuring that suffering was not carried alone.
This natural movement between expansion and contraction is embedded in our biology. At the core of our social functioning lie fundamental actions:
These actions form the foundation of our social operating system and can be felt on micro, macro, and mezzo levels. They are deeply connected to our sense of belonging and intrinsically linked to our relationship with nature, the cosmos, and collective consciousness.
The Role of Embodied Movement in Connection
According to Bonnie Bainbridge Cohen, founder of Body-Mind Centering®, our relational or neurocellular movement patterns are instinctual and ongoing, supporting our ability to survive and thrive.
Our neurocellular movements help us:
When these movements are disrupted - by trauma, neglect, or relational ruptures (familial, communal, or societal) - we misplace our sense of belonging. Without this experience of foundational support (yield) and awareness of our deeper connection to the past, present, and future, we will continually seek and strive (through work, education, possessions) for a sense of self-love and belonging.
In this process, we get sidetracked from experiencing our unique gifts and greater purpose. When we suppress our unique light and creative expression, we don’t just diminish our own potential - we weaken the fabric of our collective existence.
We are interconnected.
When your inner light is stifled, we all lose something valuable.
For today, ask yourself a few questions:
How do I hold myself back?
Where am I able to comfortably express or bring my inner light forward?
Do I feel aligned with my heart?
Am I vulnerable in my relationships?
How do my daily actions and behaviors contribute to the greater good?
"Call it a clan, call it a network, call it a tribe, call it a family. Whatever you call it, whoever you are, you need one. You need one because you are human."
― Jane Howard, quoted in Together: Why Social Connection Holds the Key to Better Health, Higher Performance, and Greater Happiness
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